That’s right, I put Twilight on my Netflix queue. Saturday, Strutter and I laid in bed and watched the whole thing. I went into this expecting it to be a drama written specifically for teenage girls. I expected it to be, basically, an After-School special with vampires in it. But it blew away my expectations with the amount that it actually managed to suck.
First, there’s Bella. Whatever this actress’ name is, and I’m not even going to bother looking it up, she can not act. I’m sorry, but pouting in every scene is not a skill.
Next, there’s Cedric Diggory. (That’s who he is. He’ll never be anything else to me.) He can act, but no matter what he does in this movie, no matter how badass he tries to be, he’s still going to get killed by Voldemort.
Third, there’s the quiet. There are ENTIRELY too many pauses during dialogue. Pausing during speech does not equal drama. It equals irritation.
And lastly… the story is just crap. Yeah, I know it was written for teenage girls. So was Harry Potter, and it’s awesome.
And that’s all I have to say about this waste of two hours.
Law Abiding Citizen was pretty awesome, however, as well as the FX series Archer. And both of those managed to take my mind off of this terrible attempt at a movie.